Hello my dear,
Happy Birthday! You would’ve been 28 by now. That would mean you would’ve been 3 years older than me!! Until June that is. You know numbers never really mattered much to me. I know it’s a day late for you birthday but whenever you were around me I wanted it to be your birthday everyday!
I missed out on your family picnic at your resting place. It made me really sad that I would have to miss it too.
I wonder what we really would have done if you were still around… I think I would’ve given you a new laptop and external hard drive for your bday :]. I would have to teach you how to use it though because I know you aren’t tech savvy what so ever. Still though it would be mad fun trying to teach you. I think there are somethings that drives your patience… technology is one of them. You never really liked the thought of learning all that stuff and it would bother you to learn too.
It really sucks to be back home… and now no one to look forward to. I really have started back at square one. Getting back into shape, eating healthier, looking better, and just being me all over again – a more depressed me. I will try my best to keep my head up everyday my love. Shit sucks sometimes though when I really want to hear your voice and what not. It still hasn’t fully processed in my mind that you are gone either… it’s like you’re just on vacation somewhere with no phone. It does hit me when I want to text or snapchat you but i can’t. Well I mean I can but you won’t be there to receive it.
I have so many plans to do what I love and make a move on it like wearing a gopro on my head for 30 days doing a timelapse working out gaining weight. That would be cool huh?
I feel like I am too all over the place sometimes. I don’t know how you did it. You kind of just don’t stress about much and just do whatever you wanted. I need to get on that level of amazingness! Teach me while I sleep okay?
Love your boyfriend,